I think it is quite interesting to watch how different people react to the idea of a long distance relationship. Usually the majority are the “never could I ever do that”, and then there are some that go with “wow…good for you”. Some might say its hard and a select few will sympathize with you.
I am in my early twenties and so far have only ever been in 2 relationships- one that was an ldr and one that is about to turn into one. I just can’t seem to escape it, and yet I have made peace with it.
I’ve made peace with it because of the fact that I am an ambitious person and in a partner, I want someone who is always ambitious and is not afraid to take risks or push boundaries to become successful. When I met my current boyfriend back in 2013, he already made it very clear that he had plans to pursue medical school in another country. A few years later he got accepted into med school and its in the country he wanted to be in. I can miss him all I want but I can’t ever be mad. Never will I condemn him for leaving me because the reality is that if he had stayed, I might be going off to grad school somewhere on the other side of our home country. We’re both just doing what we need to do but at the end of the day we love one another.
I’m convinced that my first relationship with my ex ended because of a few things that were not just the 5000km between us.
- I was 16 years old when I entered that relationship
- It was a ldr from day one
- We never got to see one another except once a year after 2 years of dating
- He never wanted to talk about the future
Numbers 2 and 4 are particularly important because it is where my ex and my current boyfriend differ. My current boyfriend and I went to the same university for our undergraduate education and actually ended up living together for the last year. We got to know each other physically and mentally and in a way that has made us closer than my ex and I could have ever been. Also, my current boyfriend will bring up our future even before I can. He is excited to have us reunite and to me, that is a good sign. He loves me and there is no worry of him ever cheating, because I adore him equally. We act like partners and I think we have had the chance to experience a large chunk of our adult lives together.
Of course making plans and being optimistic doesn’t have to mean anything, but I really really hope that we can make it work. I know it won’t be easy but we are stubborn enough to try.